Thursday, September 17, 2009

Manic Monday...and Tuesday...and Wednesday...and...and..

Who would have thought psych would be keeping me so busy? Well it has - my days start at 5:15 am when the alarm goes off and I've been making it home between 6:30 and 7 almost every night! The ridiculously long commute of 1.5-2 hours home doesn't exactly help make the days any shorter. But I am enjoying myself - for the most part.

I had somewhat of an emotional breakdown at work in front of the resident which, might I say was super embarassing, but things happen, right? It pretty much started with a patient who was so unbelievably rude to me for the entire time I was trying to interview her that it made me really angry. I told the fellow about it and how I felt I would have negative counter-transference toward the patient. The next morning in rounds, the resident made a comment to the effect of "Jodi doesn't really like X." To which I got defensive and blurted out that it wasn't that I didn't like her, just that she was so rude and disrespectful. He immediately told me he wasn't being critical just stating an observation. I hated that this patient could make me so upset and defensive about things. Later, I pulled the resident aside for advice on how to handle the patient in regards to setting boundaries, showing my anger/frustration, etc. While asking about this I got upset and he asked me what I was feeling. I tried to tell him I was frustrated and in the middle of it, burst into tears. The first thing out of his mouth was "This is powerful." Are you kidding?!? I just embarassed myself in front of you and that's what you say? He went on to explain that this was what's called projective identification - pretty much where a patient makes you feel how they feel by treating you a certain way. So, in other words, this patient was projecting feelings of frustration, anger and sadness on me, making me feel this way, despite the fact that she never said that was how she was feeling. Crazy stuff, I tell you! Of course after all this, the patient was being needy and asked to talk to me multiple times. Oy!

Backtracking - last weekend was great! On Thursday, Corey, Dianna and I met up with Amy, her mom and her aunt+uncle for dinner. We had a great dinner and had lots of laughs thanks to stories like Amy almost being trampled by a moose :) Then Friday after work, I had a birthday dinner with Corey, Dianna and Kirsten at a great Mexican restaurant nearby. We ended the night playing Yahtzee and watching Mamma Mia...kinda dorky, but lots of fun. On Saturday we packed up the car, drove down to Charlottesville, did a little tailgating, then watched TCU beat UVA in the first football game of the season. It was loads of fun, except the fact that we were surrounded by UVA fans - nonetheless we had GREAT seats thanks to Corey's bargaining power! Sunday I spent a birthday gift card to buy some work clothes - amazing how quickly you can spend money when buying nicer clothes.

Now I've got one week left in psych. Then I'm heading home for almost an entire week because my mom is having surgery. I'm really happy I'm able to make it home - thanks to my preceptor for the next rotation (ER) being unbelievably kind and flexible. Also, we were able to find a reasonably priced flight and the in-laws generously contributed a little financial aid. I'm really looking forward to the trip home, despite the circumstances. Please keep my family, my mom and her surgeons in your prayers.

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